Adjusting to limb loss

My name is Jodi and I recently underwent surgery for bilateral amputations below the knee. I lost my right leg in January and then, without warning, lost my left leg as well. I am a type 1 diabetic and also have peripheral vascular disease. There was a sudden loss of blood flow to my feet and having stints put in to open a pathway for better blood flow was not an option.

My two options were pain management or amputation. I lived with the pain of feeling like I was walking on broken ankles and could only feel parts of my feet. My right foot was incredibly painful and I ended up with a horrible infection in my big toe that led to the decision to move forward with the surgery. Without warning, my left leg suffered the same outcome. I still have staples in my left leg, soon to be removed, and am waiting on the wounds to heal so I can wear my shrinker sleeves and get my prostheses.

I am not having an easy transition; this came out of the blue and blindsided me. I went from being outgoing, hard-working, active, social, and loving the beach life to having no feet, bedridden for the majority of the day, depressed, an emotional mess, secluded, scared, angry and living in the mountains with my sister, who was brave enough to step up and take me into her home, adjusting her life around mine to take proper care of me. I need help to get past all the negativity and move toward the positive outcome. Maybe hearing how other amputees have adjusted will help me in my journey to living a new normal life. I need to get out of this fog I’ve been in for far too long.